CHAPTER ONE: Friday Morning:
Jane is writing in her 'diary' even though it is just in a regular notebook. The unique thing about this diary is that it's entries are fantasy and very loosely based on actual events in her life. She is up early having seen her parents off camping for the weekend. Saturday she would be joining 60 of her classmates on a boat, rented and captained by Alice's father, for a day of adventures.
Jane was waiting for her friends Sharon and Alice to come pick her up from school. Jane has her own car but it is old and junky and doesn't start reliably so she has been hitching rides with them. So there she was sitting at her desk rereading her last entry about the first “date” she had with Kirk. The next entry she had planned was to talk about the first time they had sex. (Which of course didn't really happen. Seriously right here Jane bad idea! Don't write down anything you don't want others to see!).
“She might have been the only girl in California who lied to her diary more often then she lied to her mother. She was wise enough to know that by doing so she was moving perilously close to lying to herself.”
(I find that sad that she feels that her life is so uninteresting that she has to make shit up. At what point would fiction become reality in her mind?)
So it turns out that Kirk and herself were both in the ice cream store and she ended up having to fork over 19 cents to help pay for his ice cream. Then he felt obligated to sit and talk with her. He finally did ask her out but only to come over to her house to watch a baseball game. (Very Classy kirk! Use the poor girl for her cable TV!) After that they were sort of started seeing each other.
(I'm honestly not sure what Kirk is? By the description of his build I would have assumed he was, and this is very stereotypical, a dumb jock except she states here that he finds classes boring and he never was one for athletics. So what does that make him? A slacker? I don't know?)
“Her grades weren't outstanding, and no one – God forbid – would have called her a nerd.”
(Now Jane that isn't very nice! Nerds are people too and there is nothing wrong with being a nerd!)
Unfortunately for Jane before she got down to the nitty gritty of her “fake sexual encounter” she notices a neighbourhood cat trying to eat her sweet furry bunny rabbit Easter. She runs down the stairs and out the backdoor to shoo the cat away, leaving her “diary” open on her desk. (Aww after she went to all that trouble fishing it out of her hiding spot in her bottom desk drawer. Tsk tsk Jane. I smell something bad is about to happen.)
(Actually I want to know how the rabbit got out of his cage in the first place? Does she regularly let him out to run around the back yard? I don't know to many people that do that, just saying. Jane needs to get a better cage so poor Easter won't get eaten!)
She reassures Easter, after scaring away the cat, and puts him back in his cage. As she enters the house she hears her friends pull in the driveway. Sharon comes in and immediately asks if she has food, finds a box of donuts and starts to eat them. (First of all nice breakfast, second of all I wish I had that metabolism!!) Alice had introduced Jane to scuba diving and was bringing her a long sleeved wet suit to use on their boat trip. Jane also works part time at Alice's fathers dental clinic and because of this he also gives her all the compressed air she needs to dive. (That's pretty nice of him actually. He sounds like a hard ass but I guess even hard asses have some softness to them sometime. Unless he doesn't pay her a wage? Although I am pretty sure he does.)
They talk about the trip the next morning and what time they have to leave. Sharon says that she asked Alice if it was alright if Kirk came which upset Jane because she wanted to ask Alice herself. Alice and Kirk were a couple before Jane hooked up with him. Sharon just shrugged and said she did her a favour and it didn't seem like Alice cared one way or another. Sharon leaves to use Jane's bathroom. Alice comes in soon after.
Alice eats a donut and then because it seems like all kids of dentists are anal about flossing and brushing and because Sharon was not back from the bathroom yet they end up in Jane's parents bathroom and talk some more about the big trip. Jane also notices that Alice is developing a cold sore but Alice passes it off as nothing and refuses the offer of some blistex for it. ( I guess this tidbit is important considering this is the third time that it has been pointed out? I have a feeling it has something to do with Kirk.)
Unfortunately for Jane Patty Brane is attending as well. Patty, the head cheerleader, has made it a mission to make Jane's life miserable. Jane offended Patty when she worked on the school paper.
Alice goes to see what the hell is taking Sharon so long while Jane brushes her hair. (Again?????) She is still a bit worried for Easter and has a weird sense of foreboding about the whole incident but reassures herself that he will be fine.
“Surely Easter was safe in his cage. A tiger couldn't paw through the wire.”
(ahhhh seriously HOW did Easter GET out in the first place!? Apparently tiger's can't paw through it but rabbits can!)
They get to school, Alice goes off to remind people of the early departure time and Sharon grills Jane about sex with Kirk. Jane tries to tell her that they haven't yet but Sharon doesn't seem to believe. (Gee I guess someone was reading something she shouldn't have been. No wonder why it took her so long to come back from the bathroom.)
I think Jane gets a tad jealous when she spots Kirk talking to a girl in a red outfit but the mystery girl disappears before Jane can see who it is. She leaves Sharon and approaches Kirk. After a hug she decided not to grill him on who he was talking to. After reassuring him that she wants him to go the next day they head off to start their school day.
Jane goes to homeroom and when Patty and her posse come in they sit right behind Jane. A prime spot to harass the shit out of her. Jane had offended probably ever cheerleader in an article she wrote for the paper a few weeks back. She even criticized the football team and the coaches skill at coaching them.
“Trak High put another six points on the board at the end of the third period on a two-yard quarterback sneak. Not to worry, Wilcox's indomitable pep squad took a two-minute hair-and-lipstick break and were smiling pretty when our boys got their hands on the ball again on the ensuing kickoff.”
(haha whoops! No wonder why Patty was out to get her. Doesn't Jane know that cheerleading is a sport too! Honestly though I have always been a bit fascinated with cheerleading. I am from Canada and for the most part we do not have cheerleaders here. So the whole concept is sort of fascinating. They are all gymnasts and do all those crazy freaking flips, throws and crazy people on people pyramids! Plus they have their own dance competitions.) Lets just say that Jane was allowed to still write for the paper just not on anything to do with sports. The football players didn't seem to care about the criticism and even sought her out for football advice. The cheerleaders on the other hand vowed to get even.
Patty is wearing a red pants suit! PATTY was the girl KIRK was talking to! (Ohh nooo he can't be interested in her!) Jane tried her best to not let Patty get to her, when she notices Alice in the hallway. She leaves her book bag at the desk and goes out and sees what Alice wants. (SHE LEAVES HER BOOK BAG ON THE DESK.!? Seriously Jane your worst enemy is sitting behind you and you leave your book bag there. You are just asking her to mess with your stuff! I'm also going to venture a guess that Jane' s diary is in her bag even though at this point she doesn't realize it yet.)
Alice tells her to wait in the hallway until she is done talking to Patty about the trip and I guess to try and get her to let off on Jane. (Ugh! Jane Jane Jane! Your stuff is still in thereeeee!) Just then Sharon comes and asks to borrow Jane's text book which of course is in her book bag in the homeroom. So she goes in and gets it while Jane still waits outside.( I feel bad things are about to happen very soon.)
The day progresses uneventfully. Jane doesn't see any of her friends nor Kirk. Shit started to go down during third period. Classmates started looking at her and snickering; it got worse as the day went on. During lunch she runs into a friend Kathy Lingren who refuses to tell her why everyone is laughing at her. (Some friend!) And then we never see or hear about Kathy again. She tries to track down Sharon or Alice because they would freaking tell her except Patty gets to her first.
Jane is horrified to see that a photocopy of her latest journal entry is in the hands of Patty. Patty says she verified it with Kirk who said that they did sleep together last Saturday. Jane is understandable upset, especially with Kirk. (What did she expect though. Guys who score are studs, girls who score are sluts, in high school at least. Sad but true.)
She goes back to her homeroom to discover her “diary” resting on a chair just like Patty said it would be. The worst thing is that she won't be able to prove that it was Patty that copied her entry. She sits down and burst into tears.
Alice and Sharon find her and try to reassure her that the sooner she finds Kirk and gets him to deny it the better off she will be.
“Jane go now. Kirk has as much to lose by this whole thing as you do.”
(I do NOT agree with that statement Alice. The only thing Kirk has to lose by deny it is looking like an ass because he already said it was true. Like I said before guys are the shit when they have teenaged sex.)
Jane realizes it's strange that the diary ended up at school and suspects Sharon and Alice. She asks both if they read it since they were both in her room. They both deny reading it. (They both totally read it!) They also both deny bringing it to school. Alice says maybe Jane accidentally put it in her book bag since it looks like a normal book. Jane didn't think that was possible.
She goes off to find Kirk but Mr. Pan runs into her first. (Now based on Pike's description of Mr. Pan he is exactly like the guidance counselor in the show Freaks and Geeks, Mr. Russo. A hippie that is totally cool with anything as long as teenagers are responsible. I totally couldn't picture Mr. Pan any other way.)
(As much as it is uncomfortable to all three girls to be talking to him about sex I really have to give him props to be at least worried that she or any of them are having unprotected sex and the fact that he offered her condoms. But TWO BOXES!! He tried to give Jane TWO boxes of condoms. How much teenage sex does he thinks she is having! Also he is coming across as more then a little bit creepy here. There is some sort of line that he is crossing here.)
Not surprising Kirk had a group of guys around him when Jane finally escapes from Mr. Pan's office.
“If what Patty said is even remotely true, then you're quicker than any guy on campus 'cause I didn't feel a thing.”
To give Kirk a bit of credit here I am not entirely sure that he wanted to look like a god among his buddies.